My Eyes Are Burning Through Their Lids
I Can't Remember When I've Closed Them
I Think Of Searing Off My Lips So I Can't Scream Your Name
I Know You See That I Am Just A Shell Of Me
How Is It So Easy For You To Watch Me Bleed?
This Sucking Wound Is Eating Through My Chest
I Ache For You.
I Will Linger Here At Best
I've Got A Hole Right Here
I Think The Sun Was Out Today
I Can't Remember When I've Felt It
I Keep Waking Up To Waste Away In This Empty Room
And I Cannot Believe
The One That You Would Reach For In Your Sleep
Is Now Writhing At Your Feet
And You Just Let Me Bleed
This Sucking Wound Is Eating Through My Chest
I Ache For You
This Sucking Wound Is Bleeding Me

            For somebody who grew up with Anne Rice vampires, it isn't uncommon to dream about having black wings and cry blood instead of normal tears. I know it will ruin white dresses but then again it wouldn't be a big deal since I mostly wear black anyway. Bloody tears has been seen in anime and tv shows as well , the most recent that I've seen is the Bleach character Muramasa and the vampire series Trueblood.

I know of Stigmata that sometimes make those who have it appear to cry tears of blood but this news that I've seen shows that it is not a case of Stigmata. The hands aren't bleeding but is primarily focused on the eyes.

             I can always say I hope they find a cure or get a proper diagnosis for the kid etc etc., poor mom who is worried sick. But my instincts are screaming, "tears of blood, tears of blood!" along with thoughts that go Omg! How beautiful , How captivating! and it is hypnotic in a way. It is the kind of thing that if it happened to me or Circeris, we would be grinning all the time. Which would make us the perfect picture of lunacy.
Imagine a hyper and perky us all the time. (probably why this particular condition hasn't afflicted us) Cases like these kindda makes me wish there is such a person as Dr. House.

             Now if a sudden case of normal humans sprouting black wings somehow reaches me, I would go sulk big time.

While I am still deliberating on the next black-bag-that-will-hold-everything purchase that I plan to make. Sometime after I settle the credit card debt I accumulated from my recent trip (more of that later). I came across this video.

It is not the wealth that I am astounded by (although that will certainly help me with my planned bag purchase). It is the fact that somebody owns a michaelangelo and has it in their homes as a decor. Staring at that everyday. Now that I cant imagine. It is like owning a Caravaggio and having it hung in my hallway to torment me to do art everyday and once I am done , it will silently mock my efforts for its inferiority. Me and a Caravaggio will have a love/relationship everyday. The same feeling I get when I look at a stunning piece of drawing and I get this feeling of hugging the artist combined with a greater feeling of wanting to grab their heart out for producing such beautiful work. I dont know if I explained that last bit as eloquently as I would have want to. But me and Circeris always get dark whenever we see something we admire. 

"There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written."
Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891, preface


"It is only an auctioneer who can equally and impartially admire all schools of art."
Oscar Wilde, The Critic as Artist, 1891"


I adore simple pleasures. They are the last refuge of the complex."
Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891

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A Perfect Circle - Sleeping Beauty

delusional i believed i could cure it all for you dear
coax or trick or drive or drag the demons from you
make it right for you sleeping beauty
truly thought i could heal you
far beyond a visible sign of your awakening
failing miserably to rescue sleeping beauty
drunk on ego truly thought i could make it right
if i kissed you one more time to help you face the nightmare
but you're far too poisoned for me
such a fool to think that i could wake you from your slumber
that i could actually heal you
sleeping beauty poisoned and hopeless
far beyond a visible sign of your awakening
failing miserably to find a way to comfort you
far beyond a visible sign of you awakening
and hiding from some poisoned memory
poisoned and hopeless sleeping beauty